Church Planting Lessons
About fifteen years ago, I was invited to a meeting at a Panera Bread with a church-planting director from NYC and his team, who wanted my help to start a church on Long Island. That conversation opened my eyes to the darker side of church planting. Sometimes church plants fail for understandable reasons, and God can still teach through that. But for years, I have also watched people fail miserably because of scammers with no experience in church planting, leading young pastors down a dead end. I know several pastors who were so hurt in the process that they no longer attend church at all.
In those days, church-planting networks were popping up everywhere, and it felt exciting. Instead of taking associate pastor roles, many seminary grads were convinced that church planting was the only way forward. I am not against church planting, I am praying that God will use me to help start many more churches in the future. But that season showed me a hard truth: not all church-planting “gurus” are equal.
The director I met with had moved from the South to pastor an established Manhattan church and quickly began recruiting young pastors to plant new churches in the tri-state area. The meeting started well, but turned quickly. Right away, he asked if I could go to my church to seek financing for the new plant, because he believed Long Island churches should fund new churches on Long Island. Then he asked for a core team from my church. Finally, he wanted help finding a space, since he knew I was well networked with area pastors and leaders. When I asked what he brought to the table, his answer was simple: “My leadership.” In other words, I would raise the money, gather the people, and secure the space as a volunteer, and he would be paid to lead.
At the time, church planting was still just a dream for me. I was a youth and young adult pastor, also overseeing a growing children’s ministry program, working long hours in a church with no senior pastor, no elders, no clear direction, and no clear leader. Now I was being asked to return to that same leaderless church, convince them to support someone who claimed to be a church-planting leader but had never planted a church himself, send out some of my strongest leaders, and use my local network to find a building for them. When I pressed him again on what he contributed, the answer did not change: “My leadership.” I was not an expert at the time, but I was not a fool. That moment pushed me to study church planting more seriously. I learned that only a few church plants were surviving, for every dozen or so were being planted. Most of the highlights focus on the survivors, and no one talks about the ones that never made it. A few years later, I learned he had closed the church he pastored, left the plants he had started in chaos, and moved back south into a well-paid role built on his “missions” resume in NYC. I am thankful God protected me from that disaster.
Fast forward to 2018, I planted my own church. I am grateful I planted at 40, not in my 20s (some people find success early, but that is rare). By then, I had watched many others plant and could learn from their stories of success and failure. Recent research from Lifeway shows the median age of a church planter at launch has risen from the mid-30s to the early-40s, and multisite pastors now average around 41 at launch, reflecting a shift toward more experienced leaders stepping into planting later in life. Church planting is still a powerful way to reach people for Christ, but the pitfalls are real. I was blessed by several key decisions I made.
1. Read the Fine Print
Networks and denominations often promise big support, but much of it comes with strings attached. Grants can quietly become loans if certain conditions are not met, and if things go wrong, the pastor who signed the paperwork can be personally responsible. Many pastors also do not realize that when they purchase a building, the denomination often holds the deed, so if that denomination later drifts theologically or acts unethically, leaving can mean walking away from the very building the congregation paid for. Everything costs more than you expect, and some costs never go away, so these ownership details matter from day one.
I chose to join a denomination for theological alignment, not financial support. I had already built a relationship with them for about two years before even considering planting. During the five years I was there, we donated 6 percent (their suggestion) of our tithes and offerings and helped revive several of their churches in our area (I volunteered myself personally, with their approval, and I enjoyed doing it). It was a blessing to give rather than take, and because we did not depend on them for funding, we were free to do ministry in our local context. The building we eventually owned was gifted to us by an independent church with an aging congregation, so we did not need outside money to acquire it. From day one, our salaries and ministry programs were funded by our own tithes and offerings.
2. People Can Make or Break You
Your core team will determine your success. The wrong people can quietly derail the mission. I have seen pastors say, “My team is solid,” only to have people not show up on launch day, which forces them to add people who should not lead, either immature Christians or mature ones who expect influence because they give or serve. I always say we had 40 solid people when we started, but I rarely mention the other 10 who did not make it past launch day. I was thankful for their support, even though they did not stay, but being part of a church plant core team is much harder than serving in leadership at an established church, because it is all hands on deck, every week, for several years.
We also made sure our team understood the vision. Coming out of an ethnic church context, I was clear that we were not starting an ethnic church. While we were selecting people for the core team from the sending church, some admitted they were more comfortable staying where they were and chose not to come with us. That honesty saved us a great deal of conflict later.
3. As Every Realtor Says, Location, Location, Location
This is another vital decision: where do you plant. I knew exactly where I would plant because for ten years I had ministered in the western part of Nassau County, from the north shore to the south shore, between the Cross Island Parkway and the Meadowbrook Parkway. I knew every coffee shop where I met up with disciples, every great restaurant where I had meals with families, every hospital where I visited the sick, and every high school where I helped start Christian clubs. It is a wonderful mix of socioeconomic diversity and ethnicities.
Do not randomly pick a location. Demographics change, and trying to drop in and plant without truly knowing the community almost never works. Get to know the community, the challenges, and the opportunities. Who else is doing the work there, and how can you partner with them first, before going on your own.
4. Leadership
Although I was appalled when the church-planting director told me he was bringing “leadership” to the table, I do deeply value leadership and believe it is worth investing in. Find the right experienced leaders to help plant, and look for individuals who have helped multiple people plant churches. If you need recommendations, drop me a private message; there are several great leaders I can recommend.